What’s this? An update?? After over 2 years of complete silence??? Is this for real????
Believe it or not, I’m still around and this blog is still alive, albeit barely. I thought for sure that WordPress would have shut this blog down by now due to inactivity, but thankfully it’s still up. These past few days I’ve been enjoying reading through my old entries and reminiscing about the good old days. I never thought that this blog would see another entry, but I realized that I really liked reading (and even writing) about things I did in the past, and if I want to continue to have something to look back on in the future, then I should probably start updating more.
I may have dropped the ball on this blog, but that was only because of how crazy things got over the past two years. If you look at the last entry I made, it was dated February 29, 2020. I guess I don’t need to elaborate what happened around March 2020 for you to understand what I mean when I say things got “crazy”. Sure, Japan didn’t have it as bad as other parts of the world, but it was still a very unstable time for all of us. These past 2 years had been a whirlwind of emotions as I worked to finish my PhD in the middle of the pandemic, but things are starting to settle down (or at least I hope they are) and I finally earned my degree, which means I now have some time to breathe and get back to some of my old hobbies.
However weird it may be, I plan to continue my whole “Instabits” series, picking up where I left off in my last entry (June 2019). I think this series is the closest thing I have to a diary since it documents my monthly milestones. I already started editing the video compilations of my IG stories for the series, but it seemed strange to just pick up the blog right where I left off after I’ve been gone for so long, so I figured that before I do that I should probably give you guys a general update of what has been happening in my life these past 2 years. Don’t worry, I won’t talk about everything that happened, but I want to share some of my major life updates:
(There’s only six in total, so hopefully this entry won’t be too long.)
1. Ray and I got married!
I am officially a married woman! Ray and I decided to tie the knot on our 2nd anniversary as boyfriend-girlfriend, which was on May 3, 2021. We always talked about getting married after I finished my PhD, so this was a bit of a surprise for both of us. I always pictured us moving back to the Philippines together after I graduated, and having our wedding there. However, after talking about it and consulting with our friends and loved ones, we figured “why wait?”, especially in these uncertain times. We were together most of the time anyway, and we definitely knew we wanted to marry each other, so there’s really no reason for us to put it off. The only thing we really needed to postpone was starting a family, since I knew I wouldn’t be able to handle being pregnant while doing my PhD experiments. Plus it would be very dangerous for the fetus to be exposed to the many chemicals and X-rays that I frequently handle in my lab. Aside from that, we realized that there was nothing stopping us from getting married while I was still a student.
Our wedding took place in the middle of the pandemic. We just had a small ceremony at our house because Kyoto was in a State-of-Emergency during that time and large gatherings were discouraged. Japan’s borders were closed to outsiders which meant that none of our family members were able to attend our wedding physically. Naturally they were sad about not being able to help us with the wedding preparations, but fortunately we had a lovely group of friends who helped us with everything. And thanks to Zoom, they were still able to attend the ceremony virtually. We were worried that they would be upset that we decided to have a wedding which they could not attend physically, but they were all very supportive and extremely happy that we were finally getting married. (But we did have to promise that we would have another ceremony/wedding reception in the Philippines once this was possible.)
I made a vlog about how we prepared for our wedding, so you can just watch that:
2. We’re pregnant!
Like I mentioned in #1, Ray and I really want to start our family but we had to wait until I finished my PhD because there was no way my mental health could handle the stress of being a PhD student and being pregnant at the same time. Also, we didn’t want to risk our baby’s health as I did my experiments around harmful substances. But once I passed my dissertation defense and was cleared to graduate then we were good to go!
Maybe I’ll make a separate entry about my experiences so far of being pregnant, but for now I’m just happy to announce that we’re expecting our baby bunny next year.
3. I finished my PhD
I mentioned it several times already, but obviously I had to include it in this list since this had been my big goal for the past 4 years. It was the whole reason I came to Japan in the first place. My PhD started off great, but just like most PhDs, it became the source of many sleepless nights, anxiety attacks and tears. This was definitely the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do in my entire life (well, so far…). Doing my PhD in the middle of the pandemic was not fun at all. There were so many times that I wanted to give up. I definitely struggled A LOT. I won’t talk about everything I went through here, maybe I’ll write about it in a future blog entry if I feel like it. But just know that my mental health was at an all time low during the last year of my PhD and Ray had to talk me through several panic attacks. If it weren’t for the support and constant prayers of Ray, my family, and friends, I probably would have broken down and gone back to the Philippines. I’m just so thankful that I had that support system to pick me up and remind me of God’s plans during my darkest days.
(Just to be clear, my struggles were not a reflection of how my professors and labmates treated me. They were all very kind and supportive. I struggled mostly because of my pride and refusal to relinquish control of my life. I didn’t go through any “abuse” that many PhD students go through, but the journey is just really difficult because you feel like most of what’s happening are out of your control and things don’t always go according to plan. I think any PhD student can relate to this.)
But despite all the challenges, I finally got my degree and I’m free from both academic life and my mental health struggles ❤
4. I got my Japanese driver’s license
Ray had been trying to get me to apply for a Japanese driver’s license since 2018, but I always figured that I didn’t need it since I don’t like driving that much and I can always count on him to drive me. Besides, I had every intention of returning to the Philippines after my PhD so I thought it would just be a waste of money (and effort). However, after we got married my plans and priorities changed. After talking about it, we decided that the best choice for us and our future family would be to stay in Japan. I won’t go into detail about how we came to that conclusion, but it was definitely not an easy choice.
Anyway, since we decided to stay here, I figured it would be best for me to finally apply for a license. What really swayed my decision was when Ray and I went on a 4-day roadtrip with our friends last Golden Week. This was followed by another 2 days on the road with just the two of us for our 1st year anniversary. I felt so bad for Ray who had to drive us the entire 6 days. He actually even got sick on our first night and barely slept, but he still had to drive us the whole time since no one else had a Japanese license. After that trip, I started attending Delta Driving School so I could get my license.
Applying for a Japanese license is a million times harder than applying for one in the Philippines. I drove in the Philippines for about 15 years before coming to Japan, but after attending driving school, I realized there was still so much I didn’t know! (Mostly because no one really follows the traffic rules in the Philippines, and many drivers I know probably don’t know a lot of the traffic laws either). I started Japanese driving school last May and finally got my drivers license in August. I heard this was very fast since it usually takes at least 5 months to finish the whole process, but I was unemployed and had nothing else to do, so most days I would have 2 in-car driving lessons and attend 2 to 3 online lectures after that, which made the whole thing a lot faster.
5. I moved houses. Twice!
Moving two times in less than two years sounds stressful, but that was exactly what we did. The first move happened when Ray and I got married. Naturally we wanted to live together after our wedding, but there was no way the two of us could fit in the tiny apartment I stayed in for the past 3 1/2 years, and his apartment was too far from the university, so we had to find a new place. Fortunately we found a nice 2DK unit near the campus and that became our newlywed home. It was also where we had our wedding. We spent about a year there. It was an old apartment unit but we filled it with so many happy memories of our newlywed life. And I love that it was big enough for us to actually invite people over for lunch or dinner.
Our second move happened after I finished my PhD. Now that there was no need for me to stay near the university, we wanted to move closer to where most of our friends lived. Also, our previous apartment has a “no-kids” policy, which obviously is not good since we wanted to start a family right away. After looking at a number of apartments around Kyoto, we finally settled on a nice 3LDK in the Katsura area. It’s a bit far from my job, but thankfully I only work a few days a week so it’s been working out so far.
6. I got a job as a part-time English teacher
After I graduated, I decided to work as an English teacher. You’re probably wondering why I’m not using my hard-earned PhD degree to work for some fancy company where I can earn a huge salary. The answer to that is once again due to our desire to start a family immediately. We figured that there’s no point in me starting a new job, only to have to leave it after less than a year or so once I got pregnant. (We were very optimistic, lol. Fortunately things happened according to plan). Also, I mentioned the reason we never tried for a baby while I was still doing my PhD is because I didn’t want to put my baby through all that stress and expose him/her to harmful chemicals and x-rays. If I decide to get a job in my field, then the risks would still be there. Plus the added stress of adjusting to a new job would probably not be good for the baby and me. However, I didn’t want to just stay home with nothing to do, so Ray suggested I get a part-time teaching job. Naturally my first choice was to teach Math or Science, but it’s really hard for a foreigner in Japan (at least one that speaks practically zero Japanese) to find a job like that, so English was my best option. So far I’ve been enjoying it. My students’ age range from 3 to 70, so it’s been really interesting.
Aside from my regular English teaching job, I also got another part-time job teaching Environmental Science to two high schools in Osaka. This one is more irregular but I like it a lot since it’s closer to what I really want to teach.
So that’s been my life these past two years. It’s amazing how much can happen in that short amount of time. There were many ups and downs, but I like to focus on the ups and just reflect on how good God has been to Ray and me. I thank God everyday for every blessing He has sent our way. I never imagined my life to turn out like this back when I wrote my last blog entry in February 2020. However, during these past two years I’ve learned that God is in control of everything, and although we are free to make plans for the future, God’s ways are always higher than ours and His plans are always infinitely better. It may not seem like it when you’re going through a dark valley, but in hindsight you realize how things worked together for the better.
I’ll try to post more updates (mostly my Instabits entries) in the next few weeks. Or months. But hopefully I’ll be able to catch up and revive this blog. It will probably start dying again once the baby comes since I expect I’ll be extremely busy again when that happens, but as long as WordPress doesn’t shut this blog down, I will probably keep coming back to it when I find time 🙂
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